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Thursday, January 12, 2012

Do you know why people get marriage?Do you think they know what is marriage?Get this before you get marriage.


The meaning of marriage differs from one person to another, and from one time to another. In ancient times, for example, a marriage meant a condition in which a woman was given to a man almost as property, and often as part of a political, social, or business arrangement of some sort. For much of human history, marriage has been a permanent institution that, once entered into, cannot be dissolved except by the death of one of the spouses. In the modern world, however, marriage is a vastly different thing. On the up side, marriage is today more of a gathering of equals, rather than the subjugation of one to the other. On the down side, marriage often becomes much more temporary than it has been in years past.
The meaning of marriage can be looked at from a legal perspective. Legally, marriage is a binding contract between the two parties that joins together their possessions, income, and lives. Marriage is recognized by the state, and the dissolving of the contract can only happen through the legal process of divorce.
But, for most people, marriage has meaning beyond the legal sense. Marriage is also an agreement between the man and woman. Husband and wife take certain vows, to love one another, to cherish one another, and to stay together through sickness and health, for better and for worse. In most cases, this agreement includes sexual faithfulness, and a promise that each person will do what they can to make the other one happy. For some people, this agreement between man and woman takes the form of a covenant between not only the couple, but God as well. Thus, many marriages are performed within the rites of various churches and religious institutions.
The meaning of marriage should be looked at from a sociological perspective as well. A marriage is the conduit by which children are born; a marriage provides both a mother and a father for the children. The family unit, the relationship between parents and child, are all based on the marriage relationship.
Certainly, in the modern world, the meaning of marriage is becoming more complicated. In some areas, same-sex couples are pursuing the right to be married. Certainly, a legal recognition of this does not create or eliminate the agreements that couples make between themselves, but these couples desire that legal recognition. In addition, high divorce rates mean that many children will not be raised in a traditional family unit. Here again, the fact that the parents are not married does not mean that they are not a family, but it is changing the way that families are arranged.
As it always has, the meaning of marriage is changing as the times change. As society changes, the institution of marriage changes. These changes may or may not be a good thing; in the end, they are probably a little of both. The meaning of marriage, in the modern world, is in a bit of flux; when people do get married, they should make sure that they agree up front on what they mean by marriage.


The dictionary defines marriage as “The legal union of a man and woman as husband and wife.” In the modern world, however, this definition of marriage is simplistic at best. The definition of marriage differs from one person to another, and from one time to another. In ancient times, for example, a marriage meant a condition in which a woman was given to a man almost as property, and often as part of a political, social, or business arrangement of some sort. For much of human history, marriage has been defined as a permanent institution that, once entered into, cannot be dissolved except by the death of one of the spouses. In the modern world, however, marriage is a vastly different thing. On the up side, marriage is today more of a gathering of equals, rather than the subjugation of one to the other. On the down side, marriage often becomes much more temporary than it has been in years past.
The definition of marriage can be looked at from a legal perspective. A legal dictionary defines marriage as “the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a legal, consensual, and contractual relationship recognized and sanctioned by and dissolvable only by law.” Legally, marriage is a binding contract between the two parties that joins together their possessions, income, and lives. Marriage is recognized by the state, and the dissolving of the contract can only happen through the legal process of divorce.
But, for most people, marriage has meaning beyond the legal sense. Marriage is also an agreement between the man and woman. Husband and wife take certain vows, to love one another, to cherish one another, and to stay together through sickness and health, for better and for worse. In most cases, this agreement includes sexual faithfulness, and a promise that each person will do what they can to make the other one happy. For some people, this agreement between man and woman takes the form of a covenant between not only the couple, but God as well. Thus, many marriages are performed within the rites of various churches and religious institutions.
The meaning of marriage should be looked at from a sociological perspective as well. A marriage is the conduit by which children are born; a marriage provides both a mother and a father for the children. The family unit, the relationship between parents and child, are all based on the marriage relationship.
Certainly, in the modern world, the meaning of marriage is becoming more complicated. In some areas, same-sex couples are pursuing the right to be married. One dictionary adds an additional definition of marriage: “A union between two persons having the customary but usually not the legal force of marriage: a same-sex marriage.” Certainly, a legal recognition of this does not create or eliminate the agreements that couples make between themselves, but these couples desire that legal recognition. In addition, high divorce rates mean that many children will not be raised in a traditional family unit. Here again, the fact that the parents are not married does not mean that they are not a family, but it is changing the way that families are arranged.
As it always has, the definition of marriage is changing as the times change. As society changes, the institution of marriage changes. These changes may or may not be a good thing; in the end, they are probably a little of both. The definition of marriage, in the modern world, is in a bit of flux; this flux reflects the changing times in which we live.
During courtship and the newlywed period, a couple will often feel like their marriage will never have any problems. They assume that they will always be as passionate as they are then; that they will have a strong marriage forever. However, as many married couples discover, having a strong marriage does take work. There are certain signs that are common among couples that have a strong marriage.
Communication is one of the most important ways to have a strong marriage. This is true in all of the areas of married life. A strong marriage is one in which the couple can communicate about every issue, including children, work, household management, and sex. Couples need to be able to discuss how they are feeling, both in terms of how they feel about one another but also in terms of how they are feeling about other things in life. This does not mean that the husband and wife always agree on every issue; but it does mean that each is willing to listen to the other, and to discuss their points of view.
A strong marriage is one in which the married couple spends time together. With the hectic schedule of the modern world, couples have to make time to just be alone together. This can be anything from the weekly scheduled date night to an hour or so spent together in the evening after the kids are in bed. On a regular basis, the couple in a strong marriage will do something together that they enjoy.
There are a variety of other general characteristics of a strong marriage. In a strong marriage, husband and wife are careful to avoid temptations of infidelity. In a strong marriage, couples respect one another. In a strong marriage, people are willing to admit they are wrong. People forgive one another in a strong marriage. In a strong marriage, the partners have respect for one another’s boundaries and privacy. In a strong marriage, couples are loving, avoid unnecessary criticism, and are generally polite to one another. In a strong marriage, the couple recognized that they are a team, and organize their lives as such.

Making a good marriage takes work. During courtship and the newlywed period, a couple will often feel like their marriage will never have any problems. They assume that they will always be as passionate as they are then; that they will have a good marriage forever. However, as many married couples discover, having a good marriage does take work.
There are a variety of other general characteristics of a good marriage. In a good marriage, husband and wife are careful to avoid temptations of infidelity. In a good marriage, couples respect one another. In a good marriage, people are willing to admit they are wrong. People forgive one another in a good marriage. In a good marriage, the partners have respect for one another’s boundaries and privacy. In a good marriage, couples are loving, avoid unnecessary criticism, and are generally polite to one another. In a good marriage, the couple recognized that they are a team, and organize their lives as such.
At the root of much of these ideas is communication. Communication is one of the most important ways to have a good marriage. This is true in all of the areas of married life. A good marriage is one in which the couple can communicate about every issue, including children, work, household management, and sex. Couples need to be able to discuss how they are feeling, both in terms of how they feel about one another but also in terms of how they are feeling about other things in life. This does not mean that the husband and wife always agree on every issue; but it does mean that each is willing to listen to the other, and to discuss their points of view. Good communication makes a good marriage.
A good marriage is also one in which the married couple spends time together. With the hectic schedule of the modern world, couples have to make time to just be alone together. This can be anything from the weekly scheduled date night to an hour or so spent together in the evening after the kids are in bed. On a regular basis, the couple in a good marriage will do something together that they enjoy.
Ultimately, a good marriage is built on a foundation of love; but the bricks-and-mortar that rest on that foundation, such as communication, respect, and spending time together, take some effort.


For many parents, children quickly become the first priority. These little ones who depend on us for everything from food to clothing to love can demand almost all of our energy and attention. Still, it is extremely important after having children to make sure that your marriage comes first.
If your marriage is not strong, your children will be able to feel it. If husband and wife are constantly arguing and bickering, and seldom or never affectionate, children will learn to behave this way when they grow up. Children have an amazing ability to sense when things are wrong. It is important that you demonstrate the ability to work through problems together to your parents. In addition, if you are not both on the same page as parents, your parenting can become contradictory and confusing for your children.
Putting your marriage first insures that your needs are being met. When you are on an airplane, the airline attendants always tell you to put the oxygen mask on yourself before putting it on your children, so that you are stable enough to help them. It is the same way with marriage. By keeping your marriage strong, you keep yourself strong and much better able to care for your children.
Fortunately, there are some things that you can do to insure you will have a strong marriage. Communication is one of the most important ways to have a strong marriage. This is true in all of the areas of married life. A strong marriage is one in which the couple can communicate about every issue, including children, work, household management, and sex. Couples need to be able to discuss how they are feeling, both in terms of how they feel about one another but also in terms of how they are feeling about other things in life. This does not mean that the husband and wife always agree on every issue; but it does mean that each is willing to listen to the other, and to discuss their points of view.
A strong marriage is one in which the married couple spends time together. With the hectic schedule of the modern world, couples have to make time to just be alone together. This can be anything from the weekly scheduled date night to an hour or so spent together in the evening after the kids are in bed. On a regular basis, the couple in a strong marriage will do something together that they enjoy.
There are a variety of other general characteristics of a strong marriage. In a strong marriage, husband and wife are careful to avoid temptations of infidelity. In a strong marriage, couples respect one another. In a strong marriage, people are willing to admit they are wrong. People forgive one another in a strong marriage. In a strong marriage, the partners have respect for one another’s boundaries and privacy. In a strong marriage, couples are loving, avoid unnecessary criticism, and are generally polite to one another. In a strong marriage, the couple recognized that they are a team, and organize their lives as such.
By putting your marriage first, you not only help yourself and your spouse, you help your children.
Marriage has been a permanent fixture in Western society for millennia. While the institution of marriage has changed throughout the years, still it is a constant presence in our world. Marriage has been important to society for a variety of reasons.
Many people believe that the so-called “nuclear family,” consisting of a father, a mother, and children, are the basic building blocks of society. It is in the family that children learn to become citizens; it is in the family that children learn about relationships; it is in the family that children learn about what is expected of them in society, how to act and how to be. Central to the nuclear family is the traditional idea of marriage, consisting of one man and one woman in a monogamous and permanent relationship.
No one in the modern age would suggest that a single-parent family is not a family. With a large number of people growing up in single-parent households, it would not be right, fair, or proper to suggest that a one-parent family cannot function and achieve the same things that a two-parent family can. However, studies do suggest that children who are raised with both a mother and a father do have certain circumstantial advantages over children raised in one-parent households.
In earlier times, marriage helped to stabilize the economics of a rural agricultural society. By having one man and one woman together with their children, a regular workforce for the farm was grown at home. In industrial society, this emphasis changed from children who contribute to the family economy to a view in which the family serves as the training ground and shelter for children, preparing them for life in the adult world.
In the modern world, marriage is no longer a situation of bondage or slavery for women, as it was in medieval times. Both men and women benefit financially as well as emotionally and spiritually from the arrangement of marriage. Some studies even suggest a link between better health and marriage. In addition, marriage is an important institution to many religions who, even though marriage is licensed by the state, nevertheless sanction marriages and perform marriage ceremonies.


Marriage is supposed to be forever. In the West in particular, marriage is seen as a permanent institution. Yet, as divorce statistics tell us, a great number of marriages wind up failing. How do you know when your marriage is failing? While circumstances will vary from one marriage to the next, there are some definite signs that a marriage is failing, or at least in serious danger.
Abuse can be an indication that lets you know when your marriage is failing. When one of the partners in a marriage, whether it is the husband or it is the wife, is physically or emotionally abusive, and unwilling or unable to get treatment for the abusive tendencies, divorce is often the only viable and logical option. A man or a woman who is in physical danger from their spouse should not stay with them. Even the most conservative of religions that look at divorce as being taboo tend to see divorce as a reasonable step in the case of physical abuse.
This also tends to be the case with infidelity. For some couples, infidelity can bring them to the point where their marriage is failing. The feelings of distrust and betrayal that comes when a wife or a husband cheats are too much to handle, and the offense often is too serious to forgive. On the other hand, many couples have weathered this sort of storm and, after a long time and a long, hard road to recovery, been able to stay together. In these instances, while the vow of fidelity has been broken, the vow to stay together for better and worse can sometimes still be kept.
A marriage can only stay together as long as both parties are willing to keep working on it. Before jumping into divorce, many couples choose other options, such as marriage counseling or a trial separation. These can also be logical steps that may help to keep a marriage together. Ultimately, however, if one or both of the married couple are unable to work at their relationship, the marriage is failing.
A failing marriage is not always a marriage that will end in divorce. If your marriage is failing, but you and your partner are both willing to try to work on your relationship, your marriage does not have to end in failure. It may be painful and it will almost always be difficult, but in the end it is often worth it.

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